WordPress has pissed me off. I am now on Tumblr for the deployment blog. Visit me there!

Today is my love’s birthday and we are apart. Well technically his birthday is the 28th, but it’s the 28th already in Afghanistan. I wish that we could be together on his birthday.

Even when he’s not deployed there’s never a guarantee that he’ll be home for birthdays, anniversaries and holidays. There are always trainings, schools and details that come before those important days. Of course when he’s home we can at least make up those days within a week or so.

P is the best husband that any woman could ask for and I thank God everyday for sending him to me. Seriously, he is amazing and our wedding day is the happiest day in my life. The picture in this post is one of my favorites from that day.

So P, I love you and can’t wait until you’re home. We all miss you and love you.

So here is a link to the flag regs. Go on, take a look. I promise that you will be surprised AND you will be surprised at some of the political rule breakers (really Palin? Autographing a flag? for shame.)

One of the things that really gets under my skin are military wives who make budoir pics for their husbands and use the flag in them really. Really? Posing naked with the American flag? So fucking distasteful. But God forbid you tell them that, then they’ll yell at you for being unpatriotic.

The flag is never supposed to be used as clothing (are you listening, Kid Rock and Olympians?) or as something disoposable. That’s right; those cute flag paper plates, napkins and such that many use on the 4th of July are a no-no. Think about it. Our flag should be respected, not something that we put food on and then throw away. “It should not be embroidered on such articles as cushions or handkerchiefs and the like, printed or otherwise impressed on paper napkins or boxes or anything that is designed for temporary use and discard. “

Businesses, pay attention! Reg-”The flag should never be used for advertising purposes in any manner whatsoever….Advertising signs should not be fastened to a staff or halyard from which the flag is flown.” So quit using the flag to make your damn sales appeal to patriotic people.

And then there’s this reg “The flag should never be carried flat or horizontally, but always aloft and free.” This is something that apparently the NCAA pays no attention to at all. Maybe I should call them out on it.

Those are just a few of the regs. Seriously, please look at the website and pass it on to people. I am sure that many people have no idea of all the regs and repect that should be awarded to the flag.

my love, doing his job

One question I get or see A LOT is “When deployed, do the husbands get to come home for the birth of their children?” Short answer is that it depends. No, it is not guaranteed that a father to be will be able to come home for the birth of their child. Quite honestly, the mission when deployed is much more important in my opinion. When P and I were doing IUIs before deployment, we both fully expected that he most likely would not be present for the birth if one of the IUIs worked. Some commands will work with a father to be so that he can take his R&R (2 week break while deployed) during the time of the projected birth. Other commands do not work with fathers to be or do not have the man power to work with them.

See, all soldiers on a 12 month deployment with the Army get R&R. If there are too many fathers to be who want R&R around the same time then some of them will not be able to take it at that time. Also, it can mess with the times that others want to take R&R. For instance, P had to take his R&R less than 4 months into the deployment due to so many fathers to be in his unit needing it at the mid tour time.

I know many military wives who have given birth without the fathers due to deployment, training, etc and though it’s difficult it is not impossible. Honestly, given the choice between P being here for a birth or the 1st yr of our future baby’s life, I choose the latter.

So, are there any questions that you have or anything that you’d like to see on Military Mondays? Please comment and let me know. I promise, nothing is off limits (unless it violates OPSEC) for me

Before my husband left, we decided that we would do IVF while he was gone (with his frozen swimmers) because of the kick ass coverage under my employer. Naively, I didn’t think about how difficult it would be. The injections and side effects weren’t bad, but actually trying to get people to follow through with helping me was ridiculous. Forget the FRG-my opinion is that it is virtually useless (other than the vFRG leader-she rocks). Thank goodness my best work friend and a friend of mine, B, 45 minutes away could help me at the last minute when I needed. B drove on snowy/icy roads to get to my house, take me to and from egg retrieval (you’re under twilight anesthesia for that) AND she watched the kids during that time for me since their pre-school was closed that morning. M, my best work friend, rearranged her schedule to watch the kids during the embryo transfer. Seriously, so thankful that they came through when others could not/would not.

Speaking of the kids, parenting on my own is also very difficult. I love SB and J but damn, working full time, taking care of 6 furbabies and parenting a 1 yr old and a 2.5 yr old is not an easy task. It’s also difficult because I wish that P was here to see how well they are progressing and adjusting in our home. We had a rough start but now I cannot imagine life without them. We have our Friday night family movie nights (with pizza and popcorn) and they are loving the furbabies. J has learned to climb up steps at lightening speed and SB is sleeping better at night. They are both eating much better and I look forward to taking them out to our fave Mexican joint in a couple of weeks. These are all things that I wish P was here to experience with all of us.

Now I’m looking into the possibility of buying a house before he gets back. The thought of doing that on my own is not fun….but I am tired of renting and I am tired of this house. I want a house that I can really make into a home for us. Thank goodness for the internet and phone so that I can discuss all of this with him and email listings to him.

Ok, I’m done whining for now. The silver lining of deployment-I am learning to be way more independent and I am realizing that I can do it all when needed; our marriage and communication skills have greatly improved; I realize how lucky I am to have him as a husband; I appreciate my friends (the few that I have here) so much more; I appreciate my online friends so very much more <3 ; and I appreciate our families so much. Even though they are far away, they check on me and help in any ways that they can.

And now I am off to watch the Golden Globes pre-show and Golden Globes…oh yeah, that's another silver lining-the TV is all mine :-p

Everything is infinitely more difficult when your other half is across the world and you have 2 babes. Everything from getting new tires on one of the vehicles (how do you get the other one home?) to making a quick trip to the grocery store to sleeping soundly at night. Seriously, it’s amazing how much you take for granted until your love leaves. I cannot wait until he is home. Not only to help me parent the children but to also sleep beside me, hold me and remind me that everything will be okay.

One quick housekeeping note-I have failed miserably in the 365 Project so I am renaming it “A Year in Pictures”. Please check it out

February 16, 2011 will be our third wedding anniversary and we knew that we wouldn’t be able to celebrate it together, in person, on the actual day. My darling husband had the idea to go to The Melting Pot for an early anniversary dinner. It was amazing and perfect It was the first time that we’d been there and we will most definitely go back. After eating there, I want fondue pots!

The restaurant was not busy (it was a week night) so it was nice and cozy. We sat in a corner booth with a good bit of privacy. Our server, JT was amazing and so friendly. The food was divine. We got all of the courses and let me tell you, we were STUFFED after leaving the place! We have not been out to a “fancy” dinner in so long (Ft. Polk, his previous duty station, did not offer much in the way of eating out), so this felt like a real date and a real celebration. And for those who might be wondering about what presents we got each other, we didn’t buy each other anything. I’ll send him a special anniversary care package when the time comes but over R&R, spending quality time was what was most important to us.

Happy 3rd (early) anniversary, my love

I cannot describe the feeling of seeing your best friend/soulmate/spouse for the first time in months, knowing how close you came to losing him. My husband, as most of you know, is not on a FOB (Forward Operating Base); he is in an outlying area with little protection. The guys in his unit rely on each other and locals for protection. Guys have been KIA and WIA. Seeing him get off that plane at the airport was magical and I never wanted to let him go again. When we got home, the furbabies were excited to see him (even our senile chow mix who usually growls at him); they whined, jumped and brought him toys. It was almost like he’d never left.

The following 16 days were filled with so much fun and relaxing; and yes there was some adjusting. There were a couple of fights while he was here; but the good thing about us as a couple is that our “fights” last less than 30 minutes; then we make up and then we’re back to our lovey dovey selves. We made a mountain of memories in those 16 days; memories that will help up get through the next 2/3 of this deployment.

Over the next few weeks I’m going to devote a separate blog post to some of the especially important things that we did…my own little Military Mondays here on my blog. I know that I’ve neglected this blog but my new goal is to blog every single day….and to revive my 365 project. I hope that you’ll continue to read my ramblings and tell me what you think

If you’re a MilSpouse, please join the fun and visit WifeOfaSailor at her blog space

1. What’s the nicest thing a stranger has ever done for you?
Changed my flat tire, just outside of Atlanta, on the should of the interstate, in rush hour traffic. I was on my way to meet up with P when he was on a weekend pass when I had a blowout. A kind, older gentleman stopped and changed my tire. I was extremely thankful.

2. If you are having a hard time going to sleep, what do you do to help yourself?
Circle+Bloom programs and EFT. I also love herbal bedtime teas and yoga.

3. Name something that makes you wish you were a kid again.
When I have to pay bills or go to work

4. What is something you never believed until you experienced it?
Love at first sight.

5. What can’t you say “no” to?
My husband when he wants to go to the movies. I was never a big movie goer before I met him but I love going with him